Doulaing my children

 

I originally shared this post on my personal blog tonight and decided to share a similar version here. I called it Nurturing during injuries. But found myself during the incident talking to my daughter like I was at a birth. But do I call it doulaing or nurturing? We all know a Doula is “a woman who serves” .

Well I am a mother who serves, and meets the needs of my children. I provide them at times much physical and emotional assistance. I know it seems odd to share a story from what happened today but it is also about loving guidance and how I nurture my children. Just like I cannot ever force my children to listen or do what I ask them too, I also do not force my clients , I instead offer assistance.

Today was one of those mothering moments that I hate to have said “I told you this would happen”

The moment you hear your child screaming in  that voice that you know what it means ” mommy I broke my arm”
See yesterday I warned this same child over 7 times not to use the skateboard with a dog . Maybe I wasn’t clear,  she was letting Java our newest adopted dog that is a mere 38 pound lab Sheperd  mix , pull her while on the skateboard .
This morning as usual they were up early before 7am , it was a gorgeous few days ️highs in the low 80’s.
I was  laying in bed checking emails on my iPad . I had already been up doing laundry .
When she came running inside screaming in that voice only a mother of many injuries would know . This child is tough she was diagnosed SPD as a toddler . It is often difficult to know if it’s drama or real .
But as usual my mommy instinct knew . And upon a quick peek I knew it . A broken wrist
She had been on the skateboard again first thing this morning , but this time with Buddy our 115 pound blonde lab .She crashed in the street . Road rash up her left side, elbow , hip and butt .
She was hyperventilating . I put on the doula in me hat and told her ” look at me and slow your breath ,
Breath with me” . I knew I could not let MY worry show.
I’ve gotten better and better dealing with my kids injuries . I used to blame myself when they were little and got hurt . But after many kids I’ve realized they are kids . No matter what I say or do these little beings that were all once very high need babies turn into fierce independent youngsters and adults.
Today was hard . Taking her to the very busy orthopedic office spending two hours there . When I just wanted to be outside at the beach before it cools down again . Selfless mothering …..
It was a teaching moment and one I seriously hope and pray she learns from . While I’m not overbearing or strict when I tell them not to do this or that it is because I love them and don’t want them to get hurt . I believe in natural consequences for actions . I don’t believe in punishing or spanking.
While I’m sure some out there would be like she deserves a spanking . No the consequences of her free will,  poor choice today has caused her to be out of soccer and possibly the violin lessons she began this week, which was a birthday gift .
The poor girl turns 9 on Saturday . And will miss her first spring soccer games .
So what does this mommy do after the orthopedic ?
I took her to our favorite coffee shop for a hot chocolate with coconut milk and much needed coffee for me . Seems logical since we hadn’t even eaten breakfast .
Live  learn and love ❤️
~Lisa